The Balcony Boys

Henry is getting rather large...and less confident on the balcony railing. Stormy on the other hand, is his usual arrogant self.

Sick Blogger

I have been ill. Nothing serious...just annoying as shit. It started with a headache and sore glands and throat a week ago Sunday past. By Wednesday it had moved into my chest, where it has camped out ever since. I've been coughing my head off, particularly at night. Dry cough...hack, cough, bark, HACK COUGH BARK! It doesn't help that ALL moisture has been SUCKED out of the air in the north, either. I tried cough syrup, Benylin...it crapped out. What I need is the good stuff - codeine. I should have gotten some today...dammit.

I didn't go to the office much last week. 30 minutes on Monday, and two home visits that night. I was in on Wednesday afternoon and that was it for the week. I did work at home Wednesday night and all day Thursday and Friday. I didn't want to subject my co-workers to my hacking cough, not to mention the germs. I'm sure they appreciated it.

I'm tired of being sick. Boo.

Henry's Grand Adventure

So the weather has been warmer lately and I let the kitties out onto the balcony, leaving the door open so they can come and go, sun themselves, and get some fresh air, a change of scenery. I was sitting nearby on the phone with my friend M. from back east, and all of a sudden I heard the scrabble of nails on wood...I saw Stormy, so I knew Henry was the one who had likely fallen off. I dropped the phone and ran out, and saw Henry on the ground. I only live on the second floor, thankfully, but I think it scared the shit out of just the same. I'm sure he thought to himself "I'm screwed now"...

So I hung up quickly with my friend and took off in my sneakers and nightgown...down the stairs, out to the street and around the back of the building. I didn't see him at first, and feared he had run into the woods, where I would then have to chase him in my sneakers and nightgown. I saw him a moment later, running for someone's balcony. I dodged up on the balcony and he came over to me, looking somewhat shellshocked...poor little guy...I carried him back upstairs and shut the door, after taking Stormy back in from the balcony as well. Balcony privileges have been revoked...

What an adventure for him. I wonder if he and Stormy share their stories...

Take THAT

My dad sent me this one this morning...he is a Newfie.

A Newfie, a little man, walks into a bar in Toronto,when this huge burly American guy walks in. As he passes the little Newfie, he hits him on the neck knocking him to the floor. The big burly Yank says, "that was a karate chop from Korea."

The little Newfie gets back on his barstool and resumes drinking his beer. The burly American then goes to the bathroom and as he walks by the Newfie, he hits him on the other side of the neck, knocking him to the floor."That was a judo chop from Japan", he says.

The little Newfie decides he has had enough and leaves. A half hour later he comes back and sees the burly American sitting at the bar. He walks up behind him and knocks him on the head knocking him out. The Newfie says to the bartender, "when he wakes up, tell him that was a hockey stick from Canadian Tire".

Stress and Relaxation

I think I have perfected the art of relaxation. I can totally chill out these days. I think I even approach being comatose...I used to get terrible stressed out by finding myself in a long line-up, wondering how long it was going to take to get through my business and off doing something else. Now I look at that time spent in the waiting line a nice little relaxing break. After all, there isn't much I can do about the line. If it is the only checkout/line open, there isn't much point in whining about it. Why do you think they provide all of that great reading material for us, along with candy, drinks, and other handy gadgets right there at the checkout. How else would I know that Britney Spears has shaved her head, lost her children/husband/mind/career/sobriety/underwear/bodyguard...

Knitting has given me great patience. I knit all the time, at home, in seminars, at work during lunch or a teleconference. I knit on the bus/train/boat/plane/car and at the airport, staff meetings, at a friend's house, while watching movies, you name it. Then I give away all the mittens I've made. I'm currently experimenting with some felting wool. I'll be sure to post before and after photos.

When I need down time...I get down with my downtime. I have no problem taking time off either. As much as I enjoy my job, I also enjoy my time off with friends and family. I'll be taking about 6 weeks of time this summer, and can't wait!

My job is significantly less stressful than previous positions elsewhere, however it isn't without it's own pressures. I am coping easily now, but can also see potential for high stress at times when it's busy. I enjoy every weekend off, and will often choose to absolutely nothing, turning down invites, having socialized enough throughout the week. And not feel guilty about it.

I remember a time a few years ago when that was not the case. I'm glad to be where I am now, than where I was. I can't wait to get my hammock hung out on my balcony for some snoozing...I would love to have this hammock in that location..

Now if I can just get one for Henry...at least now he spends time on the balcony, fully entertained.

Kitty Stress

Honestly, what in the HELL was I thinking to get a kitten. Sure they're cute. That's where it ends. They are also EVIL. Henry spends his day thinking of new ways to piss me off. Turns out he is very good at it. little mofo...

So here is the latest incident report:

• he thoroughly enjoys jumping up at posters, and scratching at the wall below them...I have no idea what this is about...particularly when he does it at 4am...
• we have longer days now, so he is up EARLY and in order to get my attention, LOVES to walk over everything on my nightstand, including the telephone and answering machine, causing them to go off - so at 5am I hear "please leave a message after the beep" or a nasty ass dial tone. If the tissue box is turned right side up, there is some digging going on until he destroys the tissues in the box
• playing the blinds like a piano is still popular...only the ones in the room I happen to be in count. And when it doesn't get my attention, he steps it up and tries to climb them...
• he ran off with all three of my beading dishes...they are just empty applesauce cups with tiny beads in them for a project...the beads are ALL OVER THE FUCKING CARPET and the beading cups were jammed under the couch. I will not be picking them up...that's what vacuums are for...cleaning up after idiot cats
• I can't have a plant or clipping from a plant anywhere in the apartment, except inside the cupboard. He has chewed every single plant down to the nub, often within minutes of me bringing it home.
• He won't stay off the counter top. It doesn't seem to matter HOW many times I yell and scream at him, spray him with water, flick water at him, shove him off the end, you name it. He will come right back up there.
• He loves to ROOT. Particularly when I am sleeping. He will root at the wires behind the dresser where my TV and VCR are, and especially loves to root at the underside of my bed. It used to be open and he climbed up in there, (he had ripped the fabric off the underside of the boxspring) but now I have a duvet cover covering my boxspring and he can't get at it. It doesn't stop him from trying...again, usually at 1am, or 5 am.
• He is a puker. He looks for a clean piece of carpet on which to hurl the insides of his stomach, just for my enjoyment.
• Doors are meant to be scratched at, not closed. Particularly at 4am...I closed the spare room door to keep out some light and limit the places he can root around in while I TRY to sleep. So instead he scratches at the door, endlessly...
• He keeps knocking down the little jars of kitty treats. I have no idea why. He turns his nose up at all of them and won't eat them when I give them to him. Stormy does not suffer from this problem. He will eat all of Henry's treats. Henry just looks at them and flops on the floor.
• He loves to chew plastic. Particularly the plastic on my heating pad. There are teeth marks on it all over. He doesn't even care if I am currently using it. He will lay down next to me and start munching. Pity he wouldn't get a little jolt one of these times...
• I cannot leave a drink standing ANYWHERE. He will seek it out like a missile, and drive his head down into the glass, knocking it over and spilling the drink on whatever is near, usually my computer or some paperwork.

Okay. I'm calmed again for now. I'm sure the neighbors think I'm killing someone here by the sound of the roars coming out of me sometimes. I hope they know I'm not yelling at a child, but an insolent kitten. I know he doesn't understand what I am saying...but I can guarantee you he knows that the tone is not warm and fuzzy.

Password Hell

We've all been there. Many of us visit there frequently. I have so many passwords I want to scream...I even have a book for most of them. I have several at work, and they all expire, on different days so it is a constant struggle to keep up with them. I have a few key phrases/combinations with slight variations that I use for more than one login, but sometimes I use a service so rarely that when it comes time to sign in, I haven't the faintest idea.

We have passwords to login to our computer network at work, then to login to our email, to our child protection server, then the child protection application. We report our time and overtime through another online program, and there is a password for that. This is the one I forget frequently...when you forget it they don't email you the current password, they get you to change it again...sigh...

At home I have passwords for all of my email programs, blogger, facebook, banking with 2 banks, ebay, paypal, my sister's ebay, all the forums I visit (like lonely planet thorntree, hip forums, cbc news, etc) and passwords for other online buying accounts like Westjet, Amazon, Chapters Indigo, Staples, Future Shop, Dell, etc...the list goes on. Then there are passwords to get into the alumni stuff at university, passwords to sign into chat programs like msn and yahoo messenger.

Then there are access codes for computer, and for phonecalls regarding my student loans. I call them maybe twice a year and they expect me to remember them...I spend more time trying to forget they exist...

Password hell, I tell ya...

Computer Crash...

I can't respond to any emails today, Something has crashed on my computer...

Henry's Outdoor Adventure

Henry was out on the balcony today while I barbecued some chicken skewers. He loves hanging out in my kayak...as long as it doesn't tilt like a teeter totter and send him flying off the balcony like a rocket...

Footloose and Fancy Free

For our friend C.'s birthday, K. bought her a ticket to Footloose, and we all went yesterday. One of the local high schools put on the theatre production of the movie, while they were out of tune most of the show, the acting was terrific and the energy was high. Good for some laughs, and one particularly energetic fellow may very well end up going far, as he was quite talented - the youth who played the character Willard.

Nice way to spend a Saturday afternoon.

Grammar and Spelling Takes A Hit

Is it just me, or is anyone else bothered by the decline of good grammar, proper spelling and word usage. I mean, besides being annoying, I can't believe that educated people seem to be unable to use the proper words in their writing. I'm not talking about difficult technical words, but everyday language where people commonly misuse words, again and again. Here are a few examples, used by some of my friends and family, all of who have a minimum of high school diploma, and most have at least one college degree, if not more. One of the worst I have seen lately is a cousin of mine who is also a teacher. Now that's scary. A typographical error is one thing, where you appear to be typing with your toes instead of your fingers, however when the entirely wrong word is used, well, that is something else.

1. "I seem to have loosed my dictionary". Come on...the word is LOST! The past tense of to LOSE. There is one "O" not two. I see this one misused ALL THE TIME.


2. "I like putting epson salts in my bath". Um, Epson makes printers. What you put in your bath are EPSOM SALTS. (used by my teacher cousin)


3. "There's not to much going on here". TOO. The word is TOO. To implies you are going somewhere.


4. "Your coming with me". Sigh...the word you are looking for is YOU ARE = YOU'RE. Your implies possession, and does not refer to you doing anything at all.


5. "Well, supposebly it's going to rain tomorrow". There is no "B" in supposedly. I kid you not. Apparently you can use this form in the United States. I don't believe it. In any case, we are in Canada.


6. "I am smarter then you". The word required here is THAN. Then refers to what happened next.


7. "Live life to it's fullest". Now this one is very common and one of the trickier ones. There is only an apostrophe if you are contracting these two words - IT IS. If it doesn't make sense to use the two words, then do NOT use the apostrophe version. Sounds easy enough, but you would be surprised how many people will argue this one.


8. "This doesn't really effect me". Sigh again. The word you are searching for is AFFECT. Effect is a noun. Affect is the verb. Nouns do not describe action. The tricky part is that affect can also be a noun, but not in that sentence. You would use it like this "She has a flat affect" meaning she shows no emotion.


9. "I drank so much last night I past out". Again, no. You passed out. Notice the "D" and past tense. I know it gets complicated, but come on. Try at least.


10. "I wanted to right you a letter last night but I couldn't find a pen". Okay, this is just stupid. The word is WRITE. Not WRIGHT, RIGHT, or RITE. Get with the program.


11. "I wrote my affidavid last night for court". You know what. David isn't part of the document. The correct word is affidavit.


12. "The drugstore did not have that pacific kind of hair jell". The words you are reaching for are SPECIFIC and GEL.

I could go on and on like this website, but I think you get the idea.

Henry the Horrible

I should have known better. I should have seen it coming. Actually, I did see it coming, but chose to hope for better. I was wrong. Henry is horrible. I spent a couple of hours yesterday repotting and separating my plants at the office, where they have been since I moved here last November, not wanting to bring them home in the frosty temperatures. The end result was quite nice, and I was able to give my friend K. some plants, and have a few to take home.

Then Henry had a look at them. First when I brought them home, he tempted himself to get close to one of them best ones, a strong stalk of leafy splendor. I ROARED at him and he got the point. Or so I thought. He backed off, taking the cue, and left them alone yesterday. Then today came.

I was cuddling with Stormy, who is as needy as ever, and heard Henry doing something. You know, when the sound doesn't make sense you just KNOW they are into something. So I get up to look and he has ripped my shamrock out of it's home by the tender roots and was calmly nibbling on it sprawled on the kitchen floor, leaves nowhere in sight (down in his gullet by that point). So I ROARED at him again, and put what was left back in the pot and placed the pot up high.

Hours later I stepped out of the apartment to bring the garbage down. I may have been gone about 3 minutes at the most. When I got back the horrors met me. My strong stalk of leafy splendor was now in the middle of the kitchen floor, and there was wet mud all over the carpet, end table, and MY WHITE COUCH. Henry was skulking nearby. There were ROARS. Oh yes, there were ROARS. Henry got a time-out in the bathroom while I cleaned the mess up, and now I have shoved him out on the balcony. If only he would run away to the neighbors and never come back.

Henry is horrible. Don't let the cute fuzzy looks fool you. There is evil deep inside.

Fruits Of My Labours

Well, I had a fairly productive day today. I managed to sew up 4 skirts, including one three tiered ruffle skirt. None were any great fashion miracle, but I only spent about $70 for all four. One of the skirts is very similar in both fabric and style to one I tried on at a small Halifax shop a few weeks ago, and the pricetag on that one was $110. I thought I had taken it off the sale rack, and when they were tallying up the bill, luckily I realized the price of it! Mine cost me under $30 for a beautiful eyelet linen blend.

Of course, no task is complete without Henry's help...he was fascinated by the sewing machine's movement and while he tempted fate often, he managed not to sew his paw to a skirt...he also wanted to shove his face into my sewing kit, under the fabric, through the tissue paper patterns, and as show here, through my sewing machine arm.

Of course the highlight of the day was when he jumped up on the ironing board and knocked the hot iron off onto the carpet. Nice move. Then I had a ragged melted patch of carpet in front of the hall closet, and carpet melted onto my iron. The carpet is not quite noticeable unless you know it's there, but you can certainly feel it with bare feet, much like burnt ends of nylon rope. fuck. I was able to get most of the carpet off my iron, by heating it up again and rubbing it over brown paper. I'm sure the neighbors thought I was killing someone by the roars that came out of me. I was quite ready to punt Henry off the balcony at that point. He got a time out in the bathroom until I felt that urge pass. Then he tiptoed around me for several hours, cowering whenever I spoke, so then I felt bad and had to snuggle him. He was pretty good for the rest of the sewing, with just a few gentle reminders.

Now the big decision is which one to wear tomorrow. Nice to have choices.

Boys On New Bedding

I went out for some retail therapy last night...started out for just potting soil and a few new pots...came home with new bedding for my bed...go figure. These are the boys on the new comforter...Henry looks like a tool in the first photo as I caught him just about to yawn...hahahaha

Weekend Musings

What a neglectful blogger I've become...and what a crackbook Facebook addict I have evolved into. There isn't a day that goes by that I am not checking out Facebook. And when I'm home and can access it (no access at work) there is hardly 10 minutes that go by where I am not refreshing the page to see if anything new happened. I know. Pathetic.

The power was off this afternoon for an hour or so, kind of an involuntary Earth Hour. The power goes off quite often up here, often once a week. Real pain in the ASS I might add. Not only do I have to reset all the clocks in the house (and microwave, stove, VCR etc) I have to record the outgoing message on my answering machine each time. Sometimes I forget and people call only to hear "We are unable to take your call. Please leave a message after the tone" by some unknown voice. It could be remedied by inserting a new 9v battery into the darn thing, but that would involve me remembering that I need one when I'm actually at the store.

I am "attending" Earth Hour tonight. For those who don't know what it is, you are simply asked to turn off the lights in your home for one hour, from 8-9pm, local time, in an effort to save energy.

Power being off also seems to mean people forgot that they passed their driver's exam. When I took it (and passed, no mistakes) I quite clearly recall that when the power is out, all traffic light intersections become a 4 way stop. Apparently not everyone remembers that one. I ran down to the video store to bring back some movies (thankfully they had a slot as everything is closed until the power comes back on) and in the space of time it took for me to park, slide the movies in, and then get back out to my car, some dumbass had an accident at the intersection I had just passed through. It was a cabbie, probably tearing off for a fare somewhere. Or more likely, he didn't know about the 4-way stop thing. Most of our cabbies in town are African immigrants (why, I do not know...we are in northern Canada) so maybe they don't do that in Africa....who knows?

Henry continues to improve behaviour wise...but still ever so slowly. His most annoying habit now is waking me up early. Sometimes that involves standing on my chest. Other times it involves rooting around in my room until he gets something he knows he isn't permitted to have, and then chew it up, and maybe even drop it on my head. He also enjoys playing the blinds like a piano too, however that has diminished somewhat. He is also a very vocal kitten, and thoroughly enjoys the sound of his own voice. I think he enjoys the sound of mine somewhat less, particularly when it is yelling at him to STOP IT. PUT THAT DOWN. LEAVE IT ALONE. GO AWAY. STOP TOUCHING THAT. NO. and so on...

Stormy, on the other hand, is his usual mellow self, initiating contact at his will. His dry skin winter itch has not subsided much, and I may have to break down and actually buy some fish oil capsules to stuff down his throat...ew...

I have been severely neglecting a course I'm taking through Athabasca University. I had signed up for it last summer when I was in my old job that required me to do basic counselling with clients. It took so very long to get the paperwork processed (a multitude of reasons, beginning with my then supervisor/boss ignoring the paperwork for weeks on end) that it didn't actually begin until January of this year. Now I'm not working in that job, and the course is somewhat irrelevant to my current job, so my interest has declined accordingly. However, the fact remains that since I have not withdrawn, I need to finish or face an incomplete/failure. And I can't have that...so today I hope to manage two chapters and the related notes/study questions. The big issue is that there are no specific deadlines, other than you need to complete the course by June, and even then you can get an extension. For me, that is too open...I will fuck around until the last minute if I can without that structure. There are online quizzes and assignments...none of which I have even peeked at. For shame...

I guess I should get back to the books again then...I miss the Dana Porter Library in Waterloo...it was much more conducive to studying...

When Cohabitating with Felines

Life is always interesting, when sharing your living space with cats. Stormy and Henry share my space. Interesting is a creative way to frame it, yeah, sure...

• Henry lets you know when he is ready to get up in the morning. How thoughtful! He even remembers to go and rattle the blinds in the bedroom window, and then climb up on top of the tv tower (dresser, tv, vcr, dvd player, trash bin - because he won't leave it alone on the floor) to get at the trash bin yet again...


• Stormy will leap onto your chest to let you know he is ready to be petted. Or else.


• Henry communicates easily. And often.


• Henry has strange fetishes...sponges, dusters, feathers, plastic thingys, and elastic thingys. He went after the swiffer duster yesterday...and won it's heart. Now I have to root out a new one.


• They don't want you to forget them, so thoughtfully leave fur in many forms around your apartment. There is often a hacked up furball incident once a week, particularly since Henry-Long-Fur's arrival.


• They are quite content to be indoor cats. They play in the litter box often, just to remind them of that giant sandbox outside my neighbor's garden, being sure to whip it all around the designated litter box room (my hall closet/storage space). Henry patiently waits for you to clean the box, just so he can go in and play again.


• They look devastatingly cute together - Henry's fair lambswool fur against Stormy's pantherlike coat.


• They love playing together. And wrestling. And making one another cry out loud. Stormy growls at Henry if he gets too close while he eats. So they are fed several feet apart. When Henry is in the bag (there is always a bag to play in) Stormy loves to run and jump on top of it, pinning Henry into the bag. One of his feet are usually in Henry's eye. They also love to chase one another around the apartment - there is a short wall that divides the kitchen/living room, and they like to go around this, and around, and around, and around...
• They will listen to any and all complaints at the end of my day, and ask for nothing in return. They will let me know when they are ready for affection, often while I am doing something else with my hands.
• At least they don't leave the toilet seat up...

Hiccupless Travels

Well, somehow or another, I managed to fly from Yellowknife to Halifax and back in the space of a few days and had NO REAL TRAVEL DELAYS! If anything, my flights arrived early! It was a whirlwind trip, packed with shopping with mother, and a ton for myself, putting furniture together, minor home repairs for them, installing some computer hardware and software, etc. We were both exhausted by the time I left, however we accomplished tons in the two days I was there. Imagine what I could accomplish this summer when I visit...

We now return to our regularly scheduled programming

Sorry for the absence - been busy this week, power shopping in Halifax after flying east to return a child (for work)...tomorrow there shall be a new post. Stay tuned.

Spring is on it's way.

I had my first bbq of the season last night. The thermometer read 0C so I was GAME! Then we

were treated to an awesome display in the northern skies. Today it was warm and I sat out for the first time on my balcony since moving in. My kayak will be the next thing I want to use...though that might be a while considering they are still driving on the ice here...

The summer tires may find their way onto my car now that I live in the city and can get it done. The bicycle is iffy...I have to put it back together again...movers always take the wheels off.

The butt pot is for my friend K. who smokes out there...with the warmer weather she may come over more...lol...right K.???

Crabs?

sent to me by my mother, and it gave me a hoot. I haven't heard man new ones, but I have to say, this one is new to me. Beware, it is somewhat risque.

One day an old lady went to the doctors because she had an itch in her crotch. She told the doctor her problem and he said, 'You have the crabs'. She informed the doctor that it could not be the crabs because she was an eighty year old virgin. She went to another doctor and explained her problem to him. The doctors aid, 'You probably have the crabs' 'No' she said, 'I am an eighty year old virgin.' Frustrated, she went to a third doctor. She said, 'Doctor can you help me? I have an itch in my crotch. Don't tell me that it is the crabs because I am an eighty year old virgin. It can not be the crabs.' The doctor said, 'Jump on the table and let's have a look.' After examining, the doctor proclaimed, 'Ma'am, your right, you do not have the crabs. This cherry is sooooo old, you have fruit flies.'

Okay, tasteless too...or is it...