"pop princess-turned-child services case file"

It's hard not to laugh when you see headlines like that, but there it was in LCD...

I know better than to believe most of the crap that comes out of Hollywood in rags like Us Weekly however, this one had me howling out loud with the descriptive language and labels, such as the above headline or these for example:

1. 8-month-old head-bonking high-chair-plunger-cum-SUV co-pilot Sean Preston
2. In Touch staked a claim in the womb sweepstakes
3. bun baking in her still-warm oven
4. all is well with the stork-awaiting spouses
5. she's digging deep into Federline's baggy he-capris and grabbing the purse strings, refusing to fork over the cash
6. she finally confirmed that she is once again carrying the fruit of Kevin Federline's underemployed and frighteningly fertile loins

I mean, come on, 'by, how can you NOT laugh? The press is being mean to her, but there is so much fodder for prose...